On August 12^th I celebrated my birth daughter’s 26^th birthday alone among friends. Every year the day comes with such great anticipation and such deep emotion. There is no acknowledgment, no social media shout out, no celebration, no cake, no candles, no reminiscing about “remember whens”. That is the right of her family. The world around me has no idea of the significance of the day, no idea of the victory that was won while that little life briefly hung in the balance as I struggled with the weight of an unplanned pregnancy and all the fear that comes with it. It is a sacred day, almost too sacred to share with others. It is my day with her alone in my heart as I sit quietly with God to reflect, celebrate, grieve, and give thanks. I never want the day to end. It somehow feels unfinishable, as if there should be more but the more never comes. And I search for ways to mark it, make it everlasting, just for me, like Jacob, Joshua, and Samuel putting stones in the sacred spaces where they encountered the power and goodness of God.

This year, during my time alone in reflection, I asked God to help me find my “memorial stone” to celebrate her birthday in a concrete way, just for me. Later that night, as I listened to my friend’s child read the list of ice cream flavors from the local sweet shop, I found my stone – “birthday cake ice cream,” a flavor I would never choose. And I sat alone among friends, on August 12^th, savoring each bite, letting the sweetness of birthday cake ice cream memorialize another year of her life and the power of God’s love.